Who We Are
Founder
Blair Schulze has over 20 years experience as a psychotherapist specialising in sex and pornography addictions and founded Sex Addiction Therapy NZ. He treats a number of mental health disorders, and provides a warm supportive place for individuals and their partners to recover from the often devastating consequences of sex addiction and associated conditions.
What We Do
Blair's focus is first and foremost to help individuals heal and recover from their addiction or compulsive behaviours. This involves practical advice to help reduce and stop the addictive behaviours as well as delving deeper into the causes of the issue to help heal historical wounds, deficits and relationship issues. If needed, he also offers support to affected partners to help them on the journey of rebuilding their trust and intimacy.
Patient Promise
Blair will be there for you every step of your journey. His goal is to help you grow from your struggles, heal from your pain, and move forward to where you want to be in your life.
Initial Assessment
The first appointment will be an initial assessment. Blair will ask questions about the presenting issue, how long it has been happening for, as well as looking at your upbringing, relationship history and other relevant information.
Treatment Planning
At the end of the initial assessment appointment Blair will recommend what he thinks is the best way forward. This is typically individual therapy appointments but may also include a session (or sessions) with an affected spouse if they're willing to attend.
Treatment
Typically treatment begins with weekly or fortnightly individual therapy appointments however there may be other lifestyle recommendations that Blair can also advise on. The initial phase involves reducing or stopping the addictive/compulsive behaviour. This is usually achieved through a mix of practical methods to reduce opportunities as well as employing psychological tools.
Alongside the practical ideas, Blair will continue to explore your history, especially the amount of affection and emotional expression that was present in your upbringing. People struggling with compulsive sexual behaviour have often lacked sufficient emotional care, validation and guidance as children and adolescents. Sometimes they may also have experienced more obvious traumas.
Once these causes have been fully understood, Blair uses methods such as Emotionally Focussed Therapy (EFT), Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) and Internal Family Systems (IFS) to help people attune to their emotional world, express their needs and feelings better and build self compassion and acceptance towards themselves.
Partners can also be suffering enormously, so Blair can also offer to meet with them if they wish to. This could be a one off session or be more frequently if required.
Attachment Theory
Within the psychology field, attachment theory is the way we understand someone's relationship style (attachment style). Our attachment style is developed early in life, is usually unconscious to us but it has a huge influence on how our lives unfold. People with compulsive sexual behaviour almost always have an insecure attachment style. Understanding and modifying attachment styles is a key focus of Blair's therapy treatment. If you wish to learn more click on the link here:
https://psychcentral.com/health/4-attachment-styles-in-relationships#attachment-types
Screening Test
if you wish to complete a quick online test to see if your sexual behaviour is problematic please see the link below.
Comfortable Environment
Sex Addiction Therapy NZ has a discreet and architecturally designed therapy room in Grey Lynn, Auckland. There is no street signage and the therapy room faces west towards the Waitakere ranges (seen here on left). If you live far away from central Auckland, Blair also offers video appointments.